*WE LOVE EACH OTHER*
Someone who knows how to have lots of fun, and when times get rough, won't run. Though I've searched the world looking for you, my friendship wishes finally came true. I FOUND YOU!
Saturday, October 21
Festive Seasons>
It's the festive season once again. And voila i'm here once again blogging =.=" Happy Deepavali by the way everyone. The huge fireworks display yesterday was awesome especially from my balcony view. After watching the fireworks, reminiscing on the days that fireworks used to amaze me since I don't see them often, I went back to my comp and grew sad =.= Festive Seasons are suppose to be happy times. A promising start to a promising new year. But I've lost all faith on having a promising year.
At the start of this year, I saw the hugest fireworks display from the view of my balcony and I was clearly amazed. it was beautiful and somehow so far from reach. As it banged into the atmosphere, it felt somehow wrong for me to be standing there in my balcony in a different house with different people. And somehow memories of how i celebrated my 2005 new year came back. It was the tsunami year and us Malaysians had to mourn instead of celebrating the
great new year. So as usual, my family and I went to a party in a club (where my dad plays golf) and I remembered how I anticipated the night to be a really boring. I sat there at the usual table knowing I won't have anything to look forward to because there won't even be fireworks. But then a friend, a really nice friend that i used to have a crush on went through the whole night with me. We talked and I had so much fun. By the time 11 pm rolled around my dad was kinda drunk and i was having so much fun as he twirled me around and dance (omg my dad danced!) By the time new year rolled around, I was so happy even though there was no fireworks.
But that was last year. This year, I watched the largest firework display i could ever hope for in the balcony of my room with a bunch of friends that I don't really know and felt empty. Chinese New Year, I watched another display of fireworks, kissed my mom Happy Chinese New Year and went to sleep. My Birthday, my new friends forgotten my birthday, i spent a shyt-y day with my sister's friends feeling like an idiot while walking behind them in sungei wang and i ate my favorite cake but wanted to cry.
I'm determined however, to change it. No more terrible new years.. no more terrible Chinese New Year.. no more terrible Birthday. I'm gonna be happy for 2007. I'm gonna be happy the next time any festive seasons rolls around for 2007. But for the meantime, I'll just mourn one last time. Mourn one last time for what could've been and for what couldn't. Mourn one last time for all that I've lost and for all that will be lost. Stay tune.
Cheers. =X
